Mood for the Night


Lovin’ this & wanted to share:

 

Happy Mother’s Day!


Hello!  This Mother’s day I have a couple of notable “firsts”:

1.  This is my first Mother’s day as a Grandmother–totally cool!  I babysit each weekend and this morning at 3:30 am, her little head popped up over the crib rail and yelled “Hi!!”  Way too cute!

2.  This is the first Mother’s day that BOTH of my kids have been clean, sober, out of jail, out of treatment, living successfully on their own and gainfully employed, both at the same time!!!  I even received a dozen roses from them in an assortment of beautiful colors.  After I woke from the sudden, dead faint that struck me, I made sure I thanked them both.  Wow!

My daughter in law also surprised me with some awesome beauty/hair products that were COMPLETELY unexpected (but MUCH needed). What an sweet, considerate thing to do!  She’s working, going to school, keeping up a home for Peanut & running herself ragged.  What a great group of youngin’s.

Wishing each of you a happy, peaceful Mother’s day!  Thanks for stopping by.

Harboring a Spirit of Withoutfulness


When I was a little kid, I knew people who were always “without”.  The parents spent much of their time talking about what they did NOT have & what they could NOT do & how much money they did NOT earn/have.    In turn, the children trudged around, wallowing in withoutfulness as well.  If a well-meaning individual suggested something helpful such as “get a different job, retrain, save more, spend less, down-size” they were subjected to a sticky web of poor-me excuses as to why none of those things are possible for them and they are just pitiful victims.  Sure enough, you could feel your life force being sucked out your ear from 20 feet away…..  Holy shit Batman!  Had they put HALF the effort into “doing” that they put into NOT “doing”, they would be unstoppable forces!

My parents called it “poor mouthing”;  all I know is they (like drama magnets) sucked the life out of the universe.  All the while, I watched my parents creatively “doing”.  Not bragging about doing, or making an event out of doing…… Simply doing.  We always had plenty—OK, a more apt description would be “We always felt like we had “plenty”.  As an adult, I can look back and see we had lots of tight spots.  However, my Dad could’ve (sort of) fixed the Space Shuttle with two coat hangers and a roll of duct tape, and we shared a spirit of good fortune.  We didn’t have bad luck, we simply had creative challenges–even though it was never described that way.  Our roof leaked.  A LOT.   How great was it that we had buckets to put under it and were healthy enough to keep them emptied!  Yep, that’s the can-DO spirit!  This is NOT sarcasm:  It’s about playing the hand we’re dealt, wearing a smile.

When my kids were little, I was on public aid–welfare, food stamps, medical card, free school lunches, heating assistance–everything.  However, it was important to me that I not instill a sense of “less than” or withoutfulness in their minds and hearts.  Sometimes I had to bite my tongue, because life was tough & I sometimes felt pretty damned without–but I couldn’t stand teaching my kids that “woe is me”  is the way to be.  Sooo, I would smile and tell them “We’re budgeting for something else.  That’s why we can’t get new shoes right now.”  After all, it was the truth.  Every week, before grocery shopping, I made sure I had four extra quarters in my pocket.  Just before it was time to pay the cashier, I gave each child two quarters to get something from the gumball/toy machine at the front of the store.  They never saw me counting out food stamps.  Back in the day food stamps came in books and had to be torn out and counted, one by one.  I didn’t want to stir up a realization in their minds of what we did NOT have.

I have always been able to hone in on this spirit of withoutfulness, and while it’s a negative emotion/concept, it’s more than simple negativity.  It’s something much more destructive if it isn’t remedied.  Are any of you old enough to remember Bad Luck Schleprock from the Flintstones?  Well Wowzy, Wowzy, Woo, Woo…. That sense of NOT ENOUGHEDNESS follows these people throughout life, weighing them down like itchy, wet wool blankets draped around their souls.   You know what I’m talking about—You’ve been waited-on by THAT insurance agent, THAT clerk or THAT customer service rep…..Really, the problem isn’t a lack of resources–is it a lack of SPIRIT?  Or could it be a  lack of  CREATIVITY or a lack of GRATITUDE?   Questions for the day:

Are you making excuses instead of DOING?

Are you wearing a dank, itchy, heavy shroud of withoutfulness?

Can YOU modify your perspective today to begin throwing it OFF??

What Makes a Beautiful Life?


Sent to me by my Dear Uncle, who was raised more like a brother,  after we all returned home from Saturday’s funeral.  Author unknown

1] Prayer is not a “spare wheel” that you pull out when in trouble, but it is a “steering wheel” that directs the right path throughout the journey.



2]
So why is a Car’s WINDSHIELD so large and the Rear View Mirror so small? Because our PAST is not as important as our FUTURE. So, Look Ahead and Move on.



3]
Friendship is like a BOOK. It takes a few minutes to burn, but it takes years to write.



4]
All things in life are temporary. If going well, enjoy it, they will not last forever. If going wrong, don’t worry, they can’t last long either.



5]
Old Friends are Gold! New Friends are Diamond! If you get a Diamond, don’t forget the Gold! Because to hold a Diamond, you always need a Base of Gold!



6]
Often when we lose hope and think this is the end, GOD smiles from above and says, “Relax, sweetheart, it’s just a bend, not the end!



7]
When GOD solves your problems, you have faith in HIS abilities; when GOD doesn’t solve your problems HE has faith in your abilities.



8]
A blind person asked St. Anthony: “Can there be anything worse than losing eye sight?” He replied: “Yes, losing your vision!”



9]
When you pray for others, God listens to you and blesses them, and sometimes, when you are safe and happy, remember that someone has prayed for you.



10]
WORRYING does not take away tomorrow’s TROUBLES, it takes away today’s PEACE.

Everything I Need To Know


*All I need to know, I learned from the Easter Bunny!*

 

– Don’t put all your eggs in one basket.
– Everyone needs a friend who is all ears.

– There’s no such thing as too much love.
– All work and no play can make you a basket case.
– A cute tail attracts a lot of attention.
– Everyone is entitled to a bad hare day.
– Let happy thoughts multiply like rabbits.
– Some body parts should be floppy.
– Keep your paws off of other people’s jelly beans
– The grass is always greener in someone else’s basket.

-To show your true colors, you have to come out of the shell.
-The best things in life are still free.
-May the joy of the season fill your heart.
Happy Easter!

On Being With Dying


My phone rang Tuesday morning and I heard my Mom say “She’s a lot worse and I think you should come on.”  My mind switches to a sudden plan B.  Grabbing things I’ll need for a stay of unknown duration, making arrangements for work, animals, payroll and the daily real world shuts OFF.   I’m on the road in record time.

My Dear Aunt is one of my best friends.  I was born on her birthday & we’ve shared a special

kinship all of my life.  She had been sick for several years and finally, with Hospice, she was home to spend her last days.  We knew her time was short but she took a sudden turn & it was time for all of us to come together once more.

When I arrived she was barely responsive.  She did find the strength to tell us she loved us and she wanted to go home, but she soon slipped behind a thickening veil of clouds.  I quickly slid into my care-taking, instruction-giving nursely role and helped my family keep her comfortable.  Checking, talking, turning, medicating, praying, I was thankful to have things to do which allowed me to detach and simply be with the process.  I sat with her during the night, saying very little–taking solace in having time alone with her before she passed beyond my grasp.

Morning came; she was still clinging tenuously as family & friends came and went.  We talked, told stories…. We remembered.  Everyone called her Granny, including my kids.  My mom was Mamaw & she was Granny to them.  As a child, teen and young woman I spent a big chunk of my life in her home, milling among my cousins & loving the chaos.  It was so different from my life as an only child.

Dates, life lessons, family tragedies–we shared them all.  She and I would have ‘beauty nights’ when we sat at the kitchen table with goop on our faces or polishing our nails.  She & my Mom had similar nights with my daughter as well.  We laughed hysterically, remembering my preteen daughter working and working to remove a dried facial mask saying “Granny, it’s hard to get it out of the cracks and crevices”.  That’s when my daughter learned about wrinkles!  Hilarious, candid life played out for all of us….  We remembered years & years of home cooked food, washed dishes and stray animals.  Such a menagerie–dogs, cats, snakes, squirrels, rabbits, birds, ferrets, fish,  hamsters, mice, gerbils, guinea pigs….. Everything landed on her corner for a while…

She passed on Wednesday evening-quietly, peacefully and surrounded by love.

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