That’s What the Newspaper Said!


Once more, a hilarious compilation of stuff which I can take ZERO credit for.  Sometimes it’s nice to see the lighter side of life.

Man Kills Self Before Shooting Wife and Daughter
This one I caught in the SGV Tribune the other day and called the Editorial Room and asked who wrote this. It took two or three readings before the editor realized that what he was reading was impossible!!! They put in a correction the next day.
I just couldn’t help but send this along. Too funny..
Something Went Wrong in Jet Crash, Expert Says
Really? Ya think?
—————————————————————————-

Police Begin Campaign to Run Down Jaywalkers
Now that’s taking things a bit far!

———————————————————–
Panda Mating Fails; Veterinarian Takes Over
What a guy!
—————————————————————

Miners Refuse to Work after Death
No-good-for-nothing’ lazy so-and-so’s!
——————————————————

Juvenile Court to Try Shooting Defendant
See if that works any better than a fair trial!
———————————————————-

War Dims Hope for Peace
I can see where it might have that effect!
—————————————————————-

If Strike Isn’t Settled Quickly, It May Last Awhile
Ya think?!
———————————————————————–

Cold Wave Linked to Temperatures
Who would have thought!
—————————————————————-

Enfield ( London ) Couple Slain; Police Suspect Homicide
They may be on to something!
————————————————————————

Red Tape Holds Up New Bridges
You mean there’s something stronger than duct tape?
———————————————————-

Man Struck By Lightning: Faces Battery Charge
He probably IS the battery charge!
———————————————-

New Study of Obesity Looks for Larger Test Group
Weren’t they fat enough?!
———————————————–

Astronaut Takes Blame for Gas in Spacecraft
That’s what he gets for eating those beans!
—————- ———————————

Kids Make Nutritious Snacks
Do they taste like chicken?
****************************************

Local High School Dropouts Cut in Half
Chainsaw Massacre all over again!
***************************************************

Hospitals are Sued by 7 Foot Doctors
Boy, are they tall!
*******************************************

And the winner is……
Typhoon Rips Through Cemetery; Hundreds Dead

Did I read that right?
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4 Comments (+add yours?)

  1. phylor
    Jan 23, 2011 @ 10:53:19

    The last one reminded me of the joke, usually started by one of the kids in the car, when driving by a cemetry. Question: How many dead people do you think are in that cemetry? Answer: All of them!

    Reply

  2. Wendy Burnett
    Jan 22, 2011 @ 23:34:17

    LOVE it! Especially the last one (ummmm, weren’t they already dead?)

    Reply

  3. hibernationnow
    Jan 22, 2011 @ 23:26:50

    Love the things you post, for a fibro sufferer any laughter is a gift. Thanks.

    Reply

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